Ricky Kidd returns to prison to overcome PTSD from wrongful conviction

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CAMERON, Mo — Ricky Kidd worked hard to overcome the trauma of being convicted of a double murder he did not commit and losing 23-years of his life trapped in a place built for the guilty.

“I want to be whole and to be honest, today as I’m speaking to you, I know that I’m not,” Kidd said Tuesday before embarking on a healing journey.

Kidd has spent his year of freedom traveling across the country helping others, raising awareness for the wrongfully convicted and spreading his message of perseverance, resilience and hope. But there is one thing he needed to do for himself.

“I told myself that I never want to see this place again,” Kidd said, while standing outside the Western Missouri Correctional Center.

Kidd spent the last 7 years of his incarceration at the prison in Cameron, It is where FOX4 first met Kidd on August 15, 2019, after a judge ordered his release.

“I feel like I just walked out of a nightmare and into a dream,” Kidd said at the time.

While Kidd has come a long way on his journey of healing from the trauma of wrongful conviction, he is still dealing with PTSD that has caused fears which have not gone away.

“I have horrible nightmares of being back in this place,” Kidd said.

One recurring nightmare in particular, where Kidd is back in his cell block and realizes he is a free man, begging corrections officers for help.

“I was looking I said, ‘Hey, let me out! I’m free! I’m free already, let me out,’ and then they started laughing. Pointing and laughing,” Kidd said of the nightmare.

The fear has been so great that Kidd keeps his exoneration papers with him at all times. But on this beautiful fall Tuesday, there are no guards, no police, no one coming to take him away. Just an innocent man facing his fear, taking a big step towards becoming whole.

“Today I feel brave. I feel like I did it,” Kidd said

Kidd has started a non-profit called I am Resilience. You can follow his journey here.

A disciplinary hearing for Amy McGowan, the prosecutor responsible for Kidd’d wrongful conviction is set for Friday. Her license to practice law could be revoked.

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